I tried to save you
because I saw how beautiful you were.
And in the seeing of you
I forgot that I possessed beauty, too.
It took your wandering gaze
to remind me that I was as worthy of love as you.
For this, the crushing betrayal,
I learned to value myself,
when I could not turn my admiration onto you.
Upon looking within, I found a soft heart
that still beat with unquenchable love,
and that vision of loveliness
was more potent and powerful than a thousand suns.
Yes, I love you, forever and always
for the treasure you were to me.
But greater is a galaxy of brilliant, unnamable stars,
the song my soul sings, which outshines and outnumbers
any comely face or gentle touch.
Even yours, which has been the torch
illuminating my way with an uncertain hope,
false and doomed as a star that burns itself out.
The hope that kept me alive these many years
I did with my own tears extinguish.
Now I walk by the light of my own moon,
where no shadows creep, where the air is clear
not of my love for you, but free of self-sacrifice.
I saved me after so many tries
when my eyes beheld what you must have seen,
that my capacity to love was nearly bottomless.
And my generosity of spirit, that willingness to give
was once a never-ending ocean.
I do not know why it took so long to see
the beauty of a soul which gave without measure
and asked so little in return.
But we seldom rightly see our faults or our goodness.
Know that what I saw, in the most unexpected place,
made me love you all the more,
but also put me where I should have been all along-
at the center of my heart.
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