Viva la Vida (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

Viva la Vida. These words translate as "long live life." It was said by Louis XV1 at his execution during the French Revolution. It is a caution for the living. My final painting was completed in 1954 and it featured colorful still-life Mexican watermelons chopped in various ways. I was illustrating, 'We all come from the same source, yet every one of us is unique. Long live life in your own unique manner.' I, like the doomed English king, had accepted the certainty of my death. I knew my body wouldn't endure much longer, and my spirit was exhausted,right down to my fractured bones. I never said to myself, "It is time to go." I just let it happen. I did not plot my death but neither did I attempt to recover. By then, I had been devastated by tragedy; my brave heart had made its affirmations to no avail. Like an old, rotting Mexican home, I was disintegrating, brick by brick. In the end, only the chimney remained intact, the faint odor of smoke penetrated everything. Char had burnt my walls and my heart had been ravaged by fire.

When I looked into the mirror, I could see the girl who started out so long ago, in love with life. She had been buried beneath the rubble, somewhere. I hoped that upon my death I would proceed easily out of my body, sitting up and leaving the rubble behind. And my girl, the one whom I had shielded and adored, would reach out her perfect tiny hand and grasp my father's exquisite hand, hands like mine. He would not pull me from the wreckage, but I would walk willingly and gladly out to my new home; his home. My father's house. He would look down with a smile I had almost forgotten and say, "What have you been doing, Frida?" And my black eyes would twinkle. "Living life my way, father," I will say. 

Death is not to be feared. It is the effort to relinquish life which is hard. But death is as fluid and simple as taking your next breath. I knew death before I realized it. We met in infancy when polio threatened my life. And during the bus accident, again I saw the impatient face of death. I instantly understood it meant relief and it would have been simpler to leave. But the first two times I hadn't started living, so I clung to life. The third and last time, I couldn't resist. I gave in because I was proud of the message I was leaving behind and I really had nothing left to say. There comes a time when silence speaks best for you, even a talkative gimp like me. That was my nickname, you know. It was what the school children called me because I walked with a limp. Strangely, I never shed that idea. This is the way I thought of myself. I remained the gimp until my death. Had I spoken that aloud I would have been rebuked by admirers. But it does not matter how anyone else sees you. To me, I was Frida the limpy gimp. How does one rise above a fractured identity? You can ignore the imperfection, but at all times I was aware that under my skirts was a broken woman. I tried so hard because I was not supposed to succeed. It was forecast that I would be wheelchair and bed-bound, and what good can an invalid do under those circumstances? I showed them what I could do. What imperfect Frida with the limp and withered limb could do. I could not run like other children, but I could fly.

When the failed monarch said, "Long live life," he was captured by the guillotine. What a unusual thing to say at the moment that your life is taken. However, it is only when life is endangered that it becomes valuable. Then it transforms from a horror into a sparkling treasure. May your life continue to flourish. May others follow in my footsteps, finding the fortitude and vision to overcome difficult odds. May you understand the value of a single day. For living on this planet, however horrific it may be, is a precious privilege and pledge. While alive, we curse the daybreak because we are exhausted by our efforts and difficulties. But I assure you that when the sun sets, you will say, "Viva la vida," with your final breath.

Life must be on your terms solely. You are so distinctive and one-of-a-kind that you must be loyal to yourself, and this is something you will never regret. Even if no one supports you, living life on your own terms is the ultimate success. You may need to make some modifications to be genuine to yourself. People won't always understand you. They may dislike, and perhaps condemn you. Still, stand. The only other option is to live half-heartedly. People will not be moved by a mediocre or lukewarm lifestyle. Only a life lived with a zest, whatever your passion may be. But passionate people make a lot of blunders. You will injure both others, as well as yourself. You will make messes from time to time. People may be disappointed with you. You may well be an enigma who is called odd. Frida was an oddball. But isn't it typically the outliers who make significant contributions to the world? Being unconventional will engender criticism. Nevertheless, make strong remarks and experiment with fresh approaches. Blessed are the passionate since they grasp life and hold it in their hands.

Take hold of life; grab it while you can. Say, "To hell with fear" because it never helped you any. It is a robber. Be all of who you are, not mostly what you are. This is living without regret. I only have one regret, and that is it was too soon over. Viva la vida!

With Love,

Frida

 

Why Inept Leaders Retain Control Over Others (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

The term "suffering fools," can be interpreted two ways. It refers to tolerating ignorance. It also translates precisely as "the foolish suffer." In either case this sentence has two elements: ignorance, and pain. "Fool" is an intriguing word. It evokes images of clowns and buffoons who are purposefully stupid. Fools who are gullible, who will believe any common falsehood. They will follow a leader over a precipice while mocking others' ignorance. However, fools are worse off than the commonly stupid since everyone has been ignorant at some point in their lives, such as a newborn. Innocent children may lack knowledge, but we would not label them foolish. Fools opt to remain ignorant, preferring falsehood.

This begs the question: why would someone willfully reject scientific knowledge in favor of being uninformed, and living in the darkness of foolishness? There is just one explanation. It is because the truth can be frightening. Therefore, the idiot avoids or dismisses it, calling it stupidity. They flip the objective facts inside out to suit their own narrative. But what could be so frightening that an adult would reject established truths in favor of fiction?

Control. Or should I say, loss of control? Those who have not sacrificed their egos want to dominate the story. They have eaten a false philosophy or ideology that refers to them as the master, and they enjoy the sound of it. And, like a dog chasing a ball, they rush for the illusion that they are higher and that certain individuals are more deserving and morally acceptable because of their skin color, religion, or financial status. However, this contradicts the words of Christ. For Christ said, "Be the servant of all, and wash their feet." When control begins to slip from their grasp, idiots will ignore Christ's instructions and take matters into their own hands. They will reject empathy, compassion, and even sensibility. Then everyone around them suffers the repercussions.

When fools are put in charge, their ignorance knows no bounds and their cruelty multiplies exponentially. The result is that the masses must tolerate lies while the control-hungry sycophants grow thick and fat as ticks, ready to pop with riches. But there is hope, for fools are short-sighted. Or rather, their sight is clouded by greed. Ravenous for riches and power, they judge themselves to be smarter than they actually are, much as criminals believe they can outsmart the police but seldom do. Because facts do not lie and eventually a slip up will uncover their criminal enterprise. Their own hubris becomes the noose with which they will hang themselves. It might take years and wreak a tremendous amount of damage to innocent people. But, as usual, the control freak slips and falls. Never in history has a fool governed the globe for long, or even a single country for an extended period of time. Their reign of terror will only endure a short while as history has shown that their own overreach will bring them down. As a result, while you are suffering idiots remember that it is only a transitory situation since reality always trumps fiction, and reasoning triumphs over rage.

How can you tell whether you're siding with the foolish? You might not know. When hatred, greed, or a desire for power takes hold it will blur your vision. Anger and fear have great power. Strong negative emotions impose a set of devilish glasses, revealing only what you prefer to see. Your prejudices and concerns are mirrored back at you, confirming your darkest assumptions. Can you view the world as it is when you wear glasses that, like a movie screen, show you an alternate reality? You may declare, "I do not live in anger and fear." No? Perhaps you are unaware that you are experiencing fear since it feels similar to rage, and perhaps rage is camouflaged as a need to control. Negative emotions will disguise themselves. You will see your truest character in attempts to enslave, control, alienate, and govern people who are not like you. The question isn't whether you experience bad emotions; you do. The question is, what will you do with them?

When you are scared, do you know that it is your job to manage yourself and to transform your fear into constructive action? When you are furious, do you recognize that no one else can create rage in you, and do you calm yourself until a balanced viewpoint returns? The fool does not wish to be responsible for themselves, for it is much easier to point the finger rather than change one's self. The wise have learned that caustic emotions are their own. The wise have also learned that kindness, generosity, equality, and justice are the high road and the only spiritual path. Greed, control, prejudice-these are man-made constructs. They are the lowest path and only lead one downward. So, the wise discipline themselves, becoming ever more Christ-like.

I ask: which path have you been on? Might a pair of wicked glasses have been placed upon your head? If so, it is not too late to wriggle out of this trap and to see with a different perspective. But you may say, "Frida, what do you know about this? Of politics, psychology, and religion? You were just an artist." This is true, I was, but I was also a revolutionary. To my dying day I believed that the government should benefit the working people and not the wealthy. You may believe that Communism, the ideal of all for one and one for all, is evil or awful, but I don't care what your political views are. I am not preaching on behalf of Communism. I'm merely saying an idiot will come to regret disregarding the facts. There are many fine people who were turned into clowns and buffoons because they went intentionally ignorant, and their ignorance contributed to the great suffering of the world.

I implore you to pause and analyze if your conclusions are supported by reliable data. Are your ideas lawful? Based upon facts? Does knowledge dominate your thinking, or did you become engrossed in a fanatical moment? Do you stand on the right side of history and with Christ who commanded the Golden Rule, or are you part of a gang of fools? You, I am sure, are nobody's fool, meaning that, even if you were swept up in the moment, you still can make up your own mind about things. Use your own reasoning and logic. Look carefully at all perspectives, not only what the sympathetic tell you. Because in the end you do not want to be on the losing team, of that, I am sure. Please accept this admonishment in the spirit in which it was given. I mean no offense by it. I hate to see so much strife on earth. It is like watching a family that you love fight. It genuinely makes all countries of the world sad, and it makes your ancestors shake their heads for they can see your troubles.

Finally, to those who are suffering fools, the wise: I send to you all of my strength and perseverance, for it is difficult to see family members and friends accepting lies. You may be dejected because you are unsure about what to do. How to persuade them to remove those terrible spectacles? You cannot. It is not your obligation to govern them. I wish I could provide you a quick solution, but all there is to do is to say the truth, pray the truth, and exemplify the truth. Live the truth. If you do, nothing else is expected. Also, keep in mind that all is not lost; history shows that truth triumphs, and love never fails. This should provide considerable comfort. Isn't it true that the stronger always wins? And there is no greater power in the cosmos than love and truth. It all began, and will conclude with these. In the meanwhile, you will have to suffer fools.

With Love,

Frida

Understanding Grace as the Strength to Endure (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

Consider all the breathtaking sights your eyes have already seen, and those they will behold in the future. Can you not confess that a wonderful grace has been over your life like an umbrella, protecting you? How many times was your life spared and injury thwarted, and how many times were you completely unaware of the disasters avoided? However, most of us are only see our own problems. We glance up into the night sky and wonder if the creators of the glittering heavens are aware of our predicament. In those lonely moments, we may offer a half-hearted prayer, unsure whether it has reached its target. However, you dwell under a covering of kindness that is far more powerful and far-reaching than you can comprehend.

You see, the Creator does not need to be told about our suffering; He already understands. We are the ones who struggle to comprehend the gift we have received. For millions, no-billions of souls are waiting to be born onto this globe so that they may have their moment to shine. We come to earth with a distinct mission, to show the type of kindness we ourselves have been shown, because the earth is a really unique planet. It not only supports human and animal life, but it also serves as a testing ground. In the military, bootcamp is the first test; your mettle is being examined and there you will discover your strengths and weaknesses. Spiritually, Earth is a boot camp where souls are formed and then broken, formed and then broken again until they sparkle like the brightest shooting star. "Why should I be thankful for a bootcamp which I did not ask for?" Yes, of course you have wondered this.

You lived as a singular soul prior to birth, and will again after death. You only stay in a body for a short period of time. Any soldier will tell you that Boot Camp was a brief phase in their military careers, but a fierce one. Your soul was offered a choice: remain in the spirit realm, or journey into the vast unknown. The majority of spirits will remain in Heaven without bothering themselves. Those who follow in the footsteps of Christ, who choose the earth, will be rewarded greatly. That daring one will be catapulted above the souls who did not choose this testing ground. Why? Because much is given to those who dare. But the prize is not riches, but rather, wisdom. Riches have no value in the afterlife. You cannot take it with you, as has been said. After you leave the body, your money is worthless. We all believe we can outwit death, especially those who have wasted their lives seeking wealth. So, you see, you happily volunteered to come, and how you spend your brief time on earth will determine your fate in the hereafter.

For some, this letter will be weighty since they know they will have nothing positive to show in the hereafter. For others, it is a reminder that we're all in this together. And if you believe God cares if you are a Christian, Catholic, Buddhist, Hindu, or Muslim, it is as important to Him as the money you will not be bringing. For God sees you all as His children. Does a parent care if one of their children has dark features, and another light? It makes no difference to a good parent. All that matters is the child's behavior. Isn't this true? Similarly, even if an atheist does not believe in God, they will be assessed by their good works for that is all and everything.

My life was filled with enormous anguish. However, a unique magnanimous grace fell on me in the shape of my artistic skill. Any ability you have acquired is a treasure. This is why knowledge is so important. Learning produces knowledge, and you have come to Boot Camp to learn, to discover and develop your strengths and abilities. Growth is an individual undertaking. No one can do it for you, and nobody can prevent you from it. As you grow, knowledge accumulates and it can be used to contribute to the world in a greater capacity. During my brief life, excruciating agony forced me into the mold of a victim. As a youngster, I contracted polio, which resulted in a withered limb and limp. As a young lady, I was severely injured in an accident that crushed my entire body. The ultimate consequence was permanent, chronic agony, an inability to carry children, needing to wear body corsets and casts, futile operations, and an invalid's lifestyle. However, when I looked at myself, I chose to be grateful for God's grace rather than believe that God an unexplained and harsh hatred towards me. Mostly, my art portrayed my own anguish, and individuals who had suffered stood quietly and contemplatively before the paintings, grateful not to be alone.

Every one of us has endured. And while we mentally ascend to that realization our own pain takes precedence. However, a strong person will strive to overcome their pitiful circumstances. When you meet one, a real one, take note of their humility. Spiritual people are giving people. Teachers, artists, rescuers, benefactors, and counselors. They are present in all sectors of life and you will know them because giving is the pinnacle of their existence. I am asking-are you stuck in your own misery? Are you focused on your own pain and misfortune? Or will you, as I learned to, rise above? I painted from my bed, aided by a specially constructed scaffolding with a mirror above so I could create. I painted from my wheelchair, thinking it my very best friend, for it allowed me mobility. That is true gratitude. To say in one's heart, "I am grateful for all I have been given, despite my own pain. I purpose to use my talent to benefit others, somehow." 

During my time on Earth, I couldn't see what would become of my paintings. I merely created to relieve melancholy. There were moments when the reality of my condition stopped me in my tracks and I would sink into deep and terrible despair, contemplating suicide. Then I'd recall that I hadn't finished a specific painting. I couldn't forsake them since they were as important to me as children. I would paint again, and my vigor and purpose would return. In those magnificent moments of resurrection, I transformed into the powerful Frida that you know and love. You loved me not because I was flawless, for I was morally and physically weak. You adore me because I never gave up. Despite overwhelming odds I refused to give way to despair. And I was Frida without apology, ahead of her time. This is what you enjoy about me. And, you know what, here on the Other Side, we all adore you. When we watch you persevere, when your spirit rises and says, "I will keep fighting!" "I will not give up!" We salute you. We are all rooting for you there in Boot Camp!

So, my dears, I began this exposition by asking you a question: "If you consider all the beautiful and amazing things your eyes have seen, and those they are yet to see, can you not admit that amazing grace has been following you?" Yes, you have suffered, as have all great souls. But grace is following you, and compassion has forgiven you. Remember this, and persevere. Knowing this, bring beauty to the world. Simply open your eyes and be grateful, for everything. 

With Love,

Frida

Are You Ready to Take the Leap of Surrender? (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

Surrender is an awful word. However, it is an essential issue since it permits us to trust the process. Surrendering is the act of offering one's own will on an altar. Our own wills are the only genuine gift we have to give. Surrender is the ability to step aside quietly and graciously when we feel we are due something and allow someone else to shine. And we will only hand over to someone we trust.

Life may ask us to open our fists and to let go of what we thought was ours. Death is one of these occurrences, and so is divorce. This is why surrender is such a terrifying issue. I am not really prepared to provide counsel on surrender because I fought back when the divorce papers arrived. I resolved to cling ever closer to what was mine: another human being. Not any human, but my beloved husband. He was mine in the same way that my face, ideas, and emotions were. To rip him from the garment we were sewn into meant tearing myself in half. It felt as if I'd been handed a pair of awful sheers and told to skin myself. I had no idea where to begin, because letting go was not an option for me. It was not possible. I cared about and loved my animals, and I saw my husband as a lumbering beast locked in an awful circumstance and striving to break free. I gave in solely because he wanted to be free, not because I wanted to be free of him. To tell the truth, we were both caught and unhappy.

He had a roaming urge to make conquests much as an explorer must leave the protection of his home and explore the globe. He adored ladies in the same way a painter appreciates a naked lady posing in his studio. He yearned to run his hands over their contours and touch something secret and forbidden. These longings contradicted his duty as husband; therefore, he wandered despite attempts to control his appetite. When he didn't come home at night, I didn't have to wonder where he was. He was exploring while in the arms of another. What should a wife do in such an uncomfortable situation? Initially, I took it personally. Was I not attractive enough, not talented enough, not renowned enough, or maybe not a more experienced lover. I blamed myself for not trying hard enough to reach him. But the more I tried, putting more effort into resolving our issues, the farther away he drifted. My arms would physically hurt at night, so I pretended I was holding him rather than a pillow. The infidelities happened so frequently that I realized I had nothing to do with his deep-seated needs. Perhaps it was God's grace, but I was able to distance myself from his conquests long enough to notice the emptiness within him, and his juvenile fascination with the feminine form.

Like an animal, he was driven by an instinctive urge. A large part of him wanted to be the spouse I needed and deserved but he simply could not resist temptation which came at every step. He had established himself as a skilled and successful muralist. Despite the fact that his face was formed of dough and his tummy was as large and inviting as an oven, women were drawn to his curly-headed boyish charm. In such a wretched scenario, what else could I do but surrender my little boy?

People do things for unfulfilled, unconscious reasons because their formative needs were unsatisfied. Some individuals long for attention, while others seek a sense of power and control. There are many childhood psychological requirements that adults attempt to satisfy. Sometimes it is just for the sake of sexual adventure itself. But his was deeper. His eyes were filled with a childlike distrust and a shyness that belied a difficult childhood. I mean, his demeanor was that of an adolescent, not a man. I saw it plainly, whilst others just saw what he wanted them to see. Because I knew him so well, he returned to me after the divorce and we were married again. We knew that we were intended for one other in a manner that only he and I understood.

He was my shy boy and I was his adoring Latin madre. I was his solace, his safe haven; I was home, where he could unwind after a hard day. But I was also a personality to be reckoned with. And my art was thriving, attracting international notice. My medical demands were significant and were becoming a barrier between us. He did not want to care for me; instead, he wanted to be cared for. The surgeries, braces I had to wear, miscarriages, and bed rest all became too much for him, so he went wandering. I divorced him the second time, knowing it had been our final attempt.

The termination of our marriage did not mean the end of our love, however. He would pay me a visit to check on my physical and creative improvement. And it always felt the same: two spirits bonded. Regardless of who he was with, the bond between us remained intact. But I wouldn't be honest if I didn't reveal the full tale of my own infidelities. I never thought of them as affairs, since, while I approached both men and women, I was always with Diego in my heart. Others, to me, were either casual dalliances or revenge sex. You might say my heart was not in it, as I never lasted with anyone for long. There wasn't any adhesive there. Diego had used all of my adhesive.

There came a point when I realized I had to let him go; my lover, my everything, my heart. How can one offer God the most valuable thing while it is still hidden in ones heart? It was evident that I had to give him, but I resisted. Instead, I took medications and booze in a lethal combination since life had become a nightmare. The physical pain was constant and relentless, and I was immobile, a prisoner of my own bed. The gaping hole in my heart shouted out his name like a mother searching for a lost child. A mother will not stop hunting until the child is found, and my heart would not accept that it would be empty of him forever. And all along there was this persistent inner voice pressing me to surrender when I didn't have the strength to. What I needed was someone to sit by me in my pain and say, "It is time to let him go." Perhaps my friends and relatives attempted to help me in their own manner, but I did not listen. So, I hid the sadness as a mother might conceal the face of her deceased child. Our love was a corpse, but I refused to look at it to admit it had died.

If I had surrendered it would have been better. It matters how we end things. If we are capable and psychologically well enough, we should make peace with the aspects of ourselves that are broken. We may not be able to change either the circumstances or the other person. However, we must tell ourselves the truth. This final cleansing stage, facing our heartbreaks and failings, is crucial. Surrender can be a daily practice, not only a pre-death phase. Take an inventory every day. Inquire: What is worrying me? What am I terrified of? What is making me depressed? Perhaps you cannot undo what has occurred, but that is beside the point. Simply give up the hurt, fear, anxiety, envy, or whatever is weighing on you. This is the only way to avoid being trapped in addictive cycles since the suffering always demands to be acknowledged.

I told you that surrender is a terrible topic. You are welcome to respond, "But Frida, if I give my pain a voice I will never stop crying." And it may seem that way. However, once you acknowledge the issues to yourself, the weeping will subside. Admitting it is like cleansing a wound, just as I cleaned my physical wounds on a regular basis. Had I healed my emotional scars, I would have been able to paint many other wonderful stories of optimism. Give up what you can't carry, what's too heavy. Remember that a bird does not carry anything in its beak that is too heavy or it cannot fly.

With Love,

Frida

Do You: Against Judgementalism (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

Gentleness is commonly regarded as a feminine attribute. However, a man's tenderness does not make him any less manly. Strength reaches down and draws others up. I knew I was a paradox, a dichotomy. I wore peasant skirts, yet I sported a mustache. In a family photo I wore a suit and pulled my hair back to resemble a man, while my sisters stood awkwardly by in the clothes they were expected to wear. When my parents objected, I informed them unequivocally that they may photograph me in a suit, or not at all. It was not a prank designed to attract attention but rather a statement I was making. What was I saying? Every woman and every man contain both masculine, and feminine qualities.

Why is there a reaction against same-sex and transgender persons? Because it challenges convention. A forceful woman, a gentle guy, or even an effeminate man is neither unattractive nor inappropriate. Even a manly lady. If you are completely macho, you are a steamroller that others dread. If completely feminine you will become lethargic. You must maintain equilibrium inside yourself or you will be unbalanced. Those with all masculine energy become tyrants whereas those with all feminine energy are weaklings.

This mad, aggressive attempt to make masculine males and feminize women defies nature. Nature will reveal you. Animals are not constrained by pitifully narrow gender norms. They do what their instincts tell them to do. Nature flawlessly directs them to exhibit both male and feminine characteristics. In certain animals, the father takes care of the children while the mother goes hunting. I could identify thousands, if not millions of such role-bending actions in the animal kingdom. Are they wrong? Will you point a finger while they follow their own DNA blueprint? If that's the case, you're shaming God who created them. Similarly, you accuse God when you refuse to accept male/female energies that you cannot comprehend. Who are you to point the accusing finger? Examine your own patterns of behavior. Look inside your own heart. Even after you've removed the wrath, self-righteousness, avarice, and resentments, you are still not able to judge! Christ, our example said, unequivocally, "Don't you dare judge." Because that is God's role, and judging someone is to elevate oneself above God. 

I was judged for being an opinionated woman, a woman with a mustache who would dare to wear a man's suit. I was judged for who I married, for my political beliefs, even for what I painted. In death I was judged, as some reported that I may have taken my own life. If so, wasn't it mine to take? However, the church has warned that a soul goes to hell and there is no atonement for this sin. Is killing yourself genuinely a sin? Even now I do not know since I am not God. God will decide each situation. How could I possibly know what is ethically absolute for someone else when I hardly grasp what is wrong in my own life? When are politicians and clergy going to quit playing God? I will inform you when. When they die they shall stand naked before God Almighty. The only condemnation they will utter will be for the weight of their own guilt.

There are two cardinal sins in life that must be avoided at all costs. First, don't judge anybody else. Second, don't squander your valuable time. Don't waste it by focusing on others rather than on yourself. Use the time you have left to clean up your act; that is why you came here. By directing the finger away from yourself you have taken the incorrect course. Take that judging digit and direct it where it belongs. Now you're performing God's work. When you see yourself pointing away, correct yourself. As a consequence, everyone around you will feel more at ease. They will really appreciate your company. Even people who are not like you will notice your kindness. If God is anything, he is Jesus. And Jesus was the kindest guy who ever lived. He dubbed himself God's lamb. What is a lamb's gentleness level? What is your level of lamb-likeness? How sweet and reassuring was Christ. You don't need to correct those you criticize because God is still on the throne, isn't He? Has He asked you to correct anybody? If Christ did not correct gender, why should you? You might be astonished to learn that God will not ask you to stand beside him with an accusing finger, since all of your fingers will be pointing back at you. 

Make it your life's goal to balance your male and feminine energies. And if someone appears imbalanced to you, bless them as you go, for God is the Creator and Judge. You are not "helping God," because God does not require anyone's assistance. Do you genuinely think God needs whatever you have to offer? God laughs at your money because it isn't worth the paper it's printed on. And, sure, God is both feminine and masculine, since He is a perfect balance of both energies: Creator and Nurturer. What you have done to God by limiting Him to a male image is to cut God in half. I warn you; God will not be happy with this representation. Who is the Mother Goddess that Hindus worship? The same God you call masculine! Who's right? Who's wrong? God is neither one, nor the other. God is all-encompassing representations. We are utterly myopic when we categorize God as one or the other. This is my message: ditch the labels and get to work cleaning up your own life so you can offer God something worthwhile. Throw away established preconceptions about masculinity and femininity because they are tripping you up, leading you to a collapse.

If you only mind yourself you will find miles and miles of material for inspection and cleanup. To transform yourself is no small feat, but to transform another is an impossibility. And why focus in the wrong direction? Do you. And that, if done right, could take forever.

With Love,

Frida

5 Ways to Become a Person You Can Admire (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

You do not become someone to adore simply because you are highly educated or have a high IQ. There are brilliant intellectuals who have terrible interpersonal skills. There are also affluent folks who are greedy and unpopular. So, having a high IQ or being wealthy does not ensure that you will be someone others want to be around. What factors contribute to a magnetic personality that makes others feel at ease? 

1. They have a laid-back attitude. People you admire care, yet they leave you to make your own decisions. They listen and advise you like a good parent would, but if you want to go your own way they trust you'll learn from your mistakes. So, they're not scared to let you make errors. They understand that every error will get you to your desired result via a roundabout road. They understand that mistakes are part of the learning process. While they care enough to listen and gently make suggestions, the path you choose is entirely up to you. They have a relaxed demeanor that conveys, "I would do it this way, but in the end, it is your life."

2. They are honest and straightforward. They do not mince words; they tell it like it is even if it is harsh at first. Smooth talkers who tell you what you want to hear are more concerned with their own comfort. If the truth is unpleasant, weak people will tell a convenient truth which is generally a half the truth. How can you base your existence on knowledge that is only partly correct? Truly honest people share the complete truth. Eventually, dishonesty shines through the mask. It is preferable to be with someone who tells the complete truth and both sides of the tale.

3. They challenge themselves to grow. A superstar soul is one who forges their own path even if it means traveling alone. They are staunch individualists. They think differently and pursue tougher goals for themselves. They venture outside of conventional wisdom. Individualists consider conformity to be one of the worst things that can happen to them. This is because they are striving to attain quick expansion. If you follow trends of the herd you are not a trend leader but rather, a trend follower. Creativity must be constantly expanding. For example, as a surrealist painter I had a decision to make. I could paint popular topics. I might have imitated other artists to sell my work, or painted what was fashionable. But what I saw when I peered inside myself was unlike any style of painting I'd seen before. I was a Mexican who loved traditional Mexican clothes and bright colors, and while some labeled it quaint, I felt this expressed the aspects I was most associated with. My unique world view gave my paintings authenticity. And suddenly Mexico was represented.

I painted images of a woman's loss and agony. The key is that I searched within for inspiration. While most artists of the period portrayed what was outside of themselves, I delved within to uncover what was hidden deep in my subconscious mind: the unexpressed pain and worries. Instead of being a bore, I used the horror I had experienced to paint images that portrayed it in symbols, patterns, and colors familiar to me. Hear me out: art must originate from the strange imagery of the unconscious. Turn to your heart which feels like home, as well as to your anxiety, angst, and desire. Represent what you aren't showing the world, what you cannot put into words and which must be expressed creatively. 

Externalization will empower your art, and will be the rocket fuel that drives you to new heights. Pull what is concealed as if you were pulling water from the driest cistern. Consider: "What does it feel like to experience this?"Analogy is a useful tool for artisans. In my paintings, every worry became a nail in my spine, holding me together. I was making the statement, "Fear is holding me together." This is an example of surrealism. Take what is true and sculpt it into something symbolic. The clay is transformed into a pot that has cracked. The stillness of my closed lips (always closed) said in every portrait, "Notice my silence." And the observer would wonder why I didn't feel comfortable speaking out. Because I was raised as a Mexican lady to be silent. However, suffering will cause you to remain silent, too. Isn't this true? There are no words to describe what it's like to only know difficulty and dread. Reality humbled me from the start, thus my paintings depicted me as the classic Catholic martyr. I don't mean that I was religious; rather, martyrs are selected by fate to suffer. Giving voice to your silent suffering will challenge and expand your creativity, as well as speak compassion to the onlooker.

4. They allow themselves to feel deeply. Admirable people allow themselves to feel fully when most individuals do not accept or tolerate being moved emotionally. The average person resists being caught away by emotion and have convinced themselves that crying is embarrassing. They are afraid of displaying their true personality to others. I didn't cry in public even though I had a lot to cry about. I suffered chronic pain as a result of the failed surgeries, the accident, and polio. However, I only permitted tears in my portraits. In all my paintings tears flow down my cheeks. Why did I add it? Because I was turning my emotions inside out for the audience.Vulnerability is the ability to feel strongly and express it openly. 

Another recurring subject in my artwork was the representation of Diego on my forehead. Obviously, this represents my frequent and anguished thoughts about him. This was a raw expression of grief, worry, and desire. I felt strongly and was not ashamed to share it with my audience. Never be ashamed to feel deeply. It suggests you're sensitive. You have not allowed the world to harden you and to render your artistic abilities meaningless. Your heart is still alive. Never apologize for loving too much, too long, or too passionately, either. These are holy gifts to the world.

5. They Still Find a Reason to Hope. Depression is something I knew intimately. One does take pleasure from wallowing in misery as a hog wallows in the mud, and one's character can become self-focused due to misfortune. A freak accident nearly took my life and left me the gift of pain. But you may reason, you must have had bad karma in past lives. No, this was not the case. Rather, I was given a chain of tragic events to deal with, a test to see what I could make of it. Would I wallow, or would I redeem my time? Could I, would I take the pain, fear, and hopelessness and fashion it into anything other than self-loathing and resentment? Not only did my body turn against me, but my heart as well. Usually, a person is given one set of maladies such as an illness or a heartbreak, but not both. Suffering could have engulfed my whole life, but I refused to give into self-pity. It was ever-present, lurking in the shadows, but I ignored it and made the most of my talents and abilities.  

Why would a supposedly loving God use tremendous suffering as a test? I asked this question a thousand times, and the response was rhetorical. It said as follows: "Have faith that God has sent this and yet, still loves you." I repeatedly sought a response from God for His brutality and i was met with silence. My father was a good man, so a cosmic sadist didn't make sense to me. This was the same God who had created all that is intelligent and lovely. Nonetheless, He had left me the gift of pain.

Some of us have done nothing wrong in previous lives to warrant heavy punishment. Some of us, like the saints, come to earth, this school of suffering, to master more sophisticated skills like forgiveness and faith. On the surface, these two words appear to be motivating. But their masks slip off and they become what they really are: difficult to bear without crumbling. When excessive pressure is applied to a clay pot, the seams explode. It breaks into bits, to dust, making it impossible to rebuild. You may never be the same as you were. Tragedy is transforming. You were once a flawless specimen. The fact is, that form of you could endure very little force before breaking. Then comes life with its harshness and it fractures you not once, not twice, but so many times that you are reduced to a fine powder. And this impossible scenario is necessary for you to cease, and for God to begin. You were a nice, yet naive, person in the beginning. Now you are a decent and powerful person. 

Why must we be so strong? Because love is synonymous with power. Love selects the mountain and once there, you offer someone a hand up. Love always reaches. Strength is love in action. Not self-centered, egotistical, and worthless, but kind and compassionate. Strength has nothing to do with your ability to withstand hardship. God doesn't care if you appear brave. God sees no value in superficiality. It is better to cry than to conceal your pain. The truest strength is vulnerability; the bravery to confess when you're broken and yet, the courage to keep going, offering whatever tiny gift you have. Perhaps all you can afford is to choose a wildflower and present it to God. If it is offered with sincerity, it is more valuable than gifts given by 10 wealthy men in church.

And poverty isn't the plague you've made it out to be. Didn't Christ say it was more difficult for a rich man to enter God's Kingdom? Lack taught me a great deal. It taught me to laugh at the selfish American entrepreneurs who believed money was the only prize. I grew up in Mexico where I saw folks who were destitute, yet truly joyful every day. They possessed delight that the American elite could never understand. 

In my bed, limited by a shattered spine and heart, I worked to show the world that, even if God required me to travel through hell, I still could give something amazing back, if only a reflection of my pain. That gift became my legacy which to this day resonates, the iconic face of vulnerability in suffering. Do not respond, "Wasn't she beautiful?" when you see my severe expression. Instead, say about me, "She was a trampled flower who still raised her head towards the sun."

With Love,

Frida

The Inevitability of Grief in the Journey of Living (Dedicated to Frida Kahlo)-by Devi Nina Bingham

Everybody loses. Grief is the great equalizer. Each one knows what it is to cry, to experience longing, and to suffer loss. Nobody must explain sorrow and pain to us, for we came into this world through a traumatic and bloody process. A baby's first reaction is to cry, not to laugh. It seems we are programmed from our first breath to expect difficulty. Yet, when we lose what our heart loved the most, whether it is another person or a pet, it always catches us by surprise. The Hindus have a saying taken from sacred scripture: "All is ash." They smear ash on their foreheads to symbolize the ash each one of us becomes at death. It reminds them of a sacred truth: they are not going to live forever, and neither will anybody else. Civilizations that seem invincible now will rise and fall as time marches on because absolutely nothing in this world lasts forever. It is important to remind yourself of your temporary status, for there are worlds beyond that cannot be accessed until you have proven yourself worthy in this one. Thus, it behooves every person to think daily of their fragility and their responsibilities towards others. Yet, how many people sit and say to themselves, "All is ash," while feeling gratitude for the life they have been given? This is what it is to be a spiritual being: to reflect on the truth of impermanence.

The Buddha's teachings assert that suffering is caused by clinging to that which will be taken away. It is alright to love another, but love is not the same as attachment. Attachment to things, people, and places happens when we cling. Buddha taught that it is our clinginess, our neediness, that eventually causes pain. Why is it bad to cling? Because in our neediness we only think of one person's desires: our own. For example, if I need food, if I am starving, I am not as concerned about anyone else's welfare as I am about my own. My physical need for food will take center stage. In neediness, others' needs come secondary to your own. This is natural; it is the drive for self-preservation ensuring that we stay alive. But when applied to love, the other's needs must also be considered, at least equally. If I do not consider your needs and wants, you will think me selfish and rude and our relationship will deteriorate. This is because love gives. It is what love does. Love does not seek to take; it wants to give. When we make our own needs paramount, we are effectively saying, "You must give to me." This is not love, but attachment.

Yet, attachment happens within every relationship. It must, or a bond would not form between two people. Attachment between a parent and child is necessary. Attachment is a natural, normal, and healthy part of relating successfully. The dividing line between healthy attachment and unhealthy neediness is who comes first. If you put your beloved's needs ahead of your own, that is love. Jesus said as much: "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). This is healthy attachment. Unhealthy neediness demands that your needs be met first. You may say, but what if the other person takes advantage of me? What if I put them first and they do not appreciate it, or worse, they abuse my kindness? I would say: you must expect that this will happen. We are talking about humans here, not perfect angels. People will take advantage of your kindness and generosity because they are imperfect beings. But their immature responses must not dictate your own. You keep being your sweet self, and one day they may wake up and see that you genuinely loved them when others did not. Being loving in disposition is not the same as being a doormat. If someone is abusing you, do not stand for that. Taking abuse is not being loving; it is being a martyr, and you are not here to be anyone's savior. Your task is to be the healthiest, most loving version of yourself, but to distance yourself when you have been abused. You see, love is not attachment, and neither is love enduring abuse. Love is giving out of a full heart. And it is important to daily remind yourself that you are no more than walking ash and this meditation on your own mortality will put everything into proper perspective.

It is not an easy feat being a human. I would say it is the most difficult path that can be trod. But the great adversity you face is mostly from yourself. Because you struggle with emotions that can overwhelm you and have drives and desires for things not helpful to you, nobody has hurt you more than you have hurt yourself. Just look at my life to see. I was a chain smoker, and though the dangers of cigarettes were yet to be disclosed to the public, my own body was telling me of its struggle to breathe. However, I chose to ignore it. I preferred to rely on cigarettes to dispense with my nervous energy. We get into addictive traps because we are trying to cope with the stress of living and our own states of mind, especially anxiety and depression. Temporarily these crutches give us relief and momentary satisfaction. But in the long run they can become the nails in our coffin. We make poor choices because we are drowning in negative emotions, and bad habits give us the perceived ability to lift ourselves above our problems and to breathe again. 

The only solution, of course, is to make different choices—to substitute a bad habit like smoking with a better habit. Make a fearless moral inventory by asking, "What bad habits have I gotten into?" and "What better habits can I substitute?" Try to remember that making changes is not going to be instantaneous. Your brain will react the way it always has even after you've "made your mind up" to change. Change is a process of alternating failures and successes. I was terrible at making changes that I didn't want to make! Believe me, I am not coming at you on my moral high horse. I am only sharing what I have learned in hindsight. Being willing to improve yourself is a tremendously evolved attitude, and if you try, you are far, far ahead of most people. 

Finally, what is the benefit of keeping an open mind to change? The benefit is first to yourself, for you will improve your health and state of mind. Perhaps as important is setting a good example for others. When the youth saw a cigarette always in my hand, I was sending them the message, "It is perfectly acceptable to smoke because Frida does." Had they asked I would have warned, "Do not be like me. This is a terrible habit." People are watching what you do more than what you say, and you want your actions to say, "Be healthy, like me." The world is in the dark place that it is because there are too many people doing whatever they fancy without thinking about the message it is sending. Please remember: It is fine to make yourself happy, but how you make yourself happy has a ripple effect. Choose carefully. 

With Love,

Frida

National Pride, or Nationalism? (Dedicate to Frida Kahlo) by Devi Nina Bingham

National Pride is to align oneself with a government's rhetoric. To forsake all other ethnicity and cultures, standing in favor of your own. There is nothing wrong at all with being proud of your country and people. However, beyond that is the danger of Nationalism, a whole other animal. When a government crafts nationalistic policies, it elevates itself above all countries. It adopts a permanent superiority complex, which is to say that it considers all other ethnicity and cultures to be substandard. It compares the ideals of its own to the shortcomings of another country and feels justified in pointing the condemning finger. This would not be such a terrible thing for other countries if a superiority complex were the only symptom. But history shows that once this insidious idea of being superior takes hold, it is hard to shake because not only do the politicians adopt this strategy, but also their people can, too. When citizens support exclusionary policies, then terrific momentum builds, like a rock rolling downhill, and it is hard to stop such a machine.

Where do these ideas of superiority come from? Why do politicians espouse nationalistic agendas? Because it elevates its citizens in the eyes of the world, and this appeals to fragile egos starved for self-esteem. Citizens should stop to ask themselves why nationalism appeals to them. But they jump on the bandwagon without giving it a second thought, as it feels so wonderful to be part of the "in-group." People have difficulty defining themselves without a job or religion telling them who they are, so what they believe are easy pickings for fanatical political movements. However, not every tyrant is a nationalist. He may call himself a Communist but if the rights of the citizens have been taken away, such as the right to free speech, then the rights of the state have been pushed forward and individual rights have been pushed back. When governments trample individual rights or another country's rights, that is nationalism. 

To an extent, every country has nationalistic tendencies, but they normally fall on the side of national pride. For example, a national anthem is sung to unify a crowd at athletic events so they feel more like one people getting behind "their" team. A national flag flies above the capitol to symbolize "one country under God." Coins, currency, and stamps are country-specific, bearing the language and beloved historical heroes and heroines. There are many such emblematic symbols of a nation which they are recognizable and beloved by its citizens, holding a special meaning for them. 

But a line is crossed from pride to arrogance once a nation declares a group of people less valuable. And arrogance turns into danger when less-valued groups are designated as subhuman. So, at what point should you begin to worry? Always ask yourself: Is this pride in country, or does it devalue a group? If it takes away rights of the group for no substantial reason, if it is restricting rights and privileges because a political party does not approve of that group, then the group has become less valued in society for simply being themselves, and that is dangerous. It is dangerous to you because at any time you may be in a group that the political party finds objectionable due to your religion, your skin color, your gender, your sexual orientation, or for any other reason, and there go your rights. A democracy extends the same rights to all people regardless of their differences because it recognizes their intrinsic worth as human beings. Always ask yourself why rights are being taken away. Has the group done something injurious that harms others, or has the government done something unfair? Failure to ask yourself these simple questions can allow a nation's superiority to escalate unchecked.

Once the line of superiority is crossed, the law is mangled to enforce cruelty against foreigners or those labeled as the enemy. Justice stops being the standard and fairness is ridiculed as weakness. The military does not protect rights but enforces punishment. The society quickly devolves into a heartless, sadistic monster where violence and murder are tolerated or condoned. This is the point at which other nations will combine forces and rise up to fight the monster. I hope you never know a world war. If you do, it means the line from national pride to nationalism has been crossed, and I hope that nation's own citizens will have the courage to stand up against it. If they are complicit, history teaches that the results can be disastrous for the whole world. 

With Love,

Frida