Why does someone go to therapy? It is because the person needs to solve a problem. She is at a "stuck point," where her own resources are insufficient. She comes to learn; to discover for herself what is possible. To solve her problems, she acquires new skills. To learn is to mature, but until she solves her problem, she is in the uncomfortable, frustrating and immobilizing state called, "The Impasse" (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim). People present in therapy at the point of Impasse. Their problems have become so painful, uncomfortable or inconvenient, so costly that they cannot be ignored anymore. "The Impasse is the crucial point in therapy, the crucial point in growth...it is what compels growth, and yet, the client has no grasp on how to do this" (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim, p. 28, 29). Devoid of answers, the client looks to the therapist for support in her growth process. The therapist is the change-agent. But why does change occur- because the therapist is skillful, or because the client is cooperative, eager to learn and grow?
What The Client Doesn't Know
What the client doesn't know when she presents her case to the therapist is that, "...the aim of therapy is to make the patient not depend upon others, but to make the patient discover from the very first moment that he can do many things, much more than he thinks he can do" (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim, p. 29). What the client doesn't know is that ultimately, she will solve her own problems. Her life must be increasingly self-directed and self-determined, or else the therapist acts as a dictator, deciding for the client what is best.
All Problems Are Maturation Problems
This "artificially-induced" maturing environment of the therapy room is a strange phenomenon indeed. If a personality were allowed to develop naturally and without social hindrances or undue stress, and with familial and cultural support which is the birth right of every soul, there would be no need of an artificial maturing processes. The organism's maturation process would occur as it was intended, exponentially healthful, resulting in physiological maturation. However, we don't live in a vacuum. We live in a highly stressful, non-naturalistic society which is producing neurosis and psychological distress, where mental illnesses such as: anxiety, depression and addictions are commonplace. Since we are "hard pressed" on every side, psychotherapy is a valid answer to our modern problems of development.
How Frustrating
Life itself is a maturation process. However, Impasse can occur; that "stuck-point" where we find we've become immobilized. We cannot move forward, nor can we go back. We can neither fight nor flight, we are "frozen." To grow, we must learn. To learn, we must become frustrated with our own attempts, and be willing to try a different approach. This openness to learning is the key which unlocks our growth, our maturation, our success. Learning and growth are synonymous. We cannot grow unless we are open to learning.
Do clients present at therapy always open and eager to learn? The best-intentioned client has her unconscious psychological defense mechanisms (Freud) at work; these defenses psychology refers to as resistances. When working with resistances, they must be challenged: "Without frustration there is no need, no reason to mobilize your resources, to discover that you might be able to do something on her own, and in order to not be frustrated, which is a pretty painful experience, the child learns to manipulate the environment" (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim, p. 32). Let's be clear-therapists do not want to unintentionally be the source of frustration for a client. However, the therapist must intentionally frustrate the client's attempts to sabotage herself or the therapeutic relationship. When the client produces defenses or fabrications of the truth, challenging the client to re-think their statements or position is therapeutic. To placate the client is to be no resource at all for learning. It is like the school teacher who looks the other way when a child cannot read, and gives him a passing grade anyway. This teacher is doing that child a disservice. Similarly, by ignoring the client's distortions of the truth, the therapist is not a teacher anymore, but has resorted to being a paid listener. "Instead of mobilizing his own resources, he (the patient) creates dependencies. He invests his energy in manipulating the environment for support" (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim, p. 32). An adept therapist will neither allow a dependent relationship to develop with the client, nor will they be manipulated.
Beyond The Impasse
Once the client has realized she has inner strength and resources, and can depend upon herself, she will shift from an external locus of control to an internal. She will need the therapist's guidance less and less. She will find her internal compass again, and the performing behaviors to please others will cease. She will be "marching to the beat of her own drum." This process of shifting the locus of control is the therapy. The goal of therapy is maturation, the reliance upon one's inner resources instead of environmental support (Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim). Therapists should be working themselves out of a job! Initially though, every client will present at the therapist in a state of Impasse. What seemed "impossible" at the first session is later transformed into possible, when the client becomes aware of their attempts to manipulate, sabotage, control and blame themselves and others. When the smokescreen of their defenses have vanished, the visual field clears, and they have "eyes" to see the problem from a new, expanded perspective. She can then mobilize new found inner strength and resources, and what seemed at first glance to be the immovable problem has become a steppingstone to a healthier, more fulfilling and successful life. The Impasse has receded, and in the foreground is a new vista, ripe with possibility. The Impasse has become a gateway, the passage into a new level of responsibility. The client is freely able to respond in a healthy way to the demands of her environment, and able to respond to her inner unique directives. She has "unlocked" herself and as a result, feels more capable and confident than ever before. This is why people come to therapy.
http://www.booksie.com/health_and_fitness/article/nina_bingham/the-impasse:-why-people-go-to-therapy/chapter/1
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